August 30, 2003 ~ 5:37 p.m.
Do I Like Him For Him?

Uggghh...

Why do I have a conscience? No, if I didn't have one I'd be such a horrible person. Anyway, I feel guilty. I feel guilty about this situation with Tito. He's such a nice guy. I don't want to hurt him. I'm just not sure if I like him or if I like the fact that he likes me. I don't want to start something with him, and then realize three weeks later that I really don't care for him the way that he does for me. That's just not fair to him. It really isn't.

But, then again. I did look forward to seeing him, even before I knew that he was interested in me. Why do I have to make things so complicated?

He complimented me. At one point I told him I was sorry I was so shy. Later on he told me never to let any guy make me feel embarrassed for acting the way I do. When he told me that, my heart melted. Maybe that doesn't mean much to other girls, but to me it means the world.

There's one thing I'm frustrated about. I'm afraid to tell anybody. It's not that I don't want to tell anybody. It's just that I don't know how to bring it up, without sounding like I am bragging or trying to shove my luck in their face. I eanvy the ease in which most girls talk about their relationships. I like hearing about people stories. I love listening to my friends when they talk about their luck in the romance department. I wish I could bring up the subject just easily.

Oh well. At least I've got this diary, an outlet for myself.

I guess that's all I've got to say. As for Tito, I'll have to go with things. I am looking forward to seeing him again. I just hope its for the right reasons.

ELB

Before ~ After

Miss These?

Locking Up - January 21, 2004
Stuck in the Middle, and I Don't Like it - January 18, 2004
A Bowling Story - January 09, 2004
A New Year and Brand New Start - January 06, 2004
Girls are Worse the Ants - December 31, 2003

Me
I'm a 17 year old girl. I live in New York. When I first meet people, I'm pretty shy, but once you get me talking I won't shut up. That's about it. If you want to know more about me read some of my diary entries.

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